Dental Hell

My last appointment was by far the worst dental experience I've ever had. I cannot put into words how excruciating the pain was. It was worse than getting a dental implant drilled into my jawbone. Worse than getting my wisdom teeth out. Worse than having two root canals done in Mexico. Worse than heart surgery (and they shut my body down and sawed me open to do that sh*t!).

Long story short, a year after my root canal (American this time), my dentist figured out that my endodontist accidentally left a nerve in there, and that's why it never, ever stopped hurting. It started to hurt A LOT more recently because it got infected. The infection caused the novacaine they attempted to inject me with last week to have no effect. Something about the acidity and the pH being off. So, basically, I HAD A ROOT CANAL PERFORMED WITH NO ANASTHESIA!!!

No wonder it hurt so f%@$in' bad! See? I knew I wasn't just a whiny baby! Bastards...

I thought they stopped in the middle of the procedure last week because I was sobbing, shaking, and jerking so violently. I hyperventilated too (for the first time ever).

So today, I thought I was going back for more. You can imagine my joy when they told me they had gotten it all last time and that all I was there for today was an X-ray. Oh thank you Lord Baby Jesus!

They said it looked good for now, but I have to go back in two weeks to see if the pain stays gone. Fingers crossed...

I'm home

We're back! Yay! I'll blog pictures later when I have more time.

Leaving on a jet plane

I cannot wait for Friday night. We're taking a red-eye to New York City to see my BFF Allison, then we're taking a train down to New Haven, Connecticut for Brian's sister Erin's graduation. We'll be back late in the evening Tuesday. See ya after the long weekend!!

Working with women sucks ass

Is it really only Tuesday? Man, today was such a long, aggravating day. Some women I work with apparently decided that I didn't need my parking spot anymore, so they helped themselves to it, then got mad at me when I said something about it. I feel like that guy from Monty Python - I'm not quite dead yet! It turned into a big to-do, where everyone claimed they didn't care but stomped around the office all day real pissy-like. Whatever. I care. Ain't no shame. Go help yourself to someone else's parking spot. Crazy, audacious females.

Tall Crush

I saw a hot blonde chick as tall as me at the tall lady store today. I heard her say something about buying a jacket for court. After she left, the sales lady told me she was a lawyer too, and a criminal prosecutor even!! No way! I super-regretted not saying anything to her when I saw her. I just didn't want to harass the tall girl, you know? But just think... we could have had such a beautiful friendship. Oh well. It's a small town. I'm sure we'll run into each other again.

Turn it down!

I had my first real "I'm too old for this crap" moment last night. We went to this concert at the Joint. The lineup was The Bravery, They Might Be Giants, Plain White T's, Shiny Toy Guns, and the Silversun Pickups. We went for They Might be Giants and had no idea who these other bands were. Apparently, they're what's hot right now w/ all the Emo kids.

So there we were -- geeky 30-year-olds in a sea of Emo teenagers. We asked the hot girls in front of us how old they were and they told us 17 -- high school juniors. They came to see the Shiny Toy Guns for the second time. One of them had never heard of They Might Be Giants. God, that made me feel old.

I felt even older when I had to go to the back of the room because the loud music hurt my ears. (My head is still aching from the pain.) Standing there for three hours before TMBG came out also killed my back and my feet. I couldn't believe I had paid good money to be tortured that way. After TMBG's let-down 8-song performance, we were out of there. We missed the headliners, The Bravery, but didn't care. Who the hell are they anyway? It was a 1-hour traffic crunch out of the parking garage after the show. All in all, not worth it for an old fogie like me.

I've got a couple more concerts to go to this summer -- the True Colors Tour (Cyndi Lauper, Debbie Harry, Erasure, Dresden Dolls) in June, the Violent Femmes in July, and Kelly Clarkson in September. I'll be bringing my ear plugs for-sure.

Knocked Up...

...was really fu@*ing funny. So much like the 40-year-old Virgin in its comedy, and so so so funny. You should definitely check it out this weekend.

Defeated

I am so incredibly exhausted. This weekend was crazy.

Friday night a big group of us went out for Alexis' 30th birthday. We started at the Hofbrauhaus then went over to the Beatles bar, Revolution, at the Mirage. $1300$1700 later (spent on tableside bottleservice), there was almost a fist-fight in our group, one of our friends disappeared until 8:30 the next morning, and our 400 lb. friend Brad was absolutely wasted. The only one half-sober enough to manage the situation was Shannon, who weighs about a quarter of what Brad weighs. Kudos to Shannon for somehow getting him into her car.
Saturday, I had promised my three nephews I'd take them to this kid's festival thing, so I dragged my ass out of bed after four hours of sleep to go see Spongebob and Spiderman in person. It was grotesquely hot and the boys were wild. On the bright side, this is the best birth control EVER.

I got to collapse for about an hour before going back out Saturday night for some more birthday festivities. This time it was a "surprise" birthday dinner followed by karaoke for my friend the Housekeeper. More drinking into the wee hours of the night. No fights or missing persons this time, but I did do a horrific rendition of Sublime's Santeria, for which I should be severely punished. God awful. Here's me and the Housekeeper doing our terrible duet, censored with a picture of my cat. Inside joke.

Sunday was Mother's Day. We started out nice and early (after 5 hours sleep) with a nice brunch at Roy's, followed by a visit to the Titanic exhibit with Brian's mom and two of my nephews. The baby was one of them that we took, which made for a super-exhausting time at the museum.

Later we met up w/ the Housekeeper, who shared her sweet hook-ups with us so that we could all go see Spamalot. I liked it a lot. Thought it was really cute. Brian, a Monty Python purist, had some OCD issues with it not being just like the movie. ((shrug)) I don't know. I've never been a huge fan of the movie, but I love musicals, and thought this one was really cool. Sidenote: I guess Alice Cooper was sitting behind us, but I didn't notice.

Today I think I got my punishment for that horrible karaoke song. I had two dentist appointments - one for my latest stubborn bastard of a tooth problem, and the other for a follow-up on my tooth implant. Both were devastatingly traumatic. I think I have an official fear of dentists, starting today.

We were supposed to have a make-up Mother's Day dinner tonight with Brian's stepmom, but I just can't do anymore. I'm going to go veg out in front of the TV for the rest of the night. I just can't take anymore fun.

Allison and the Angry Inch

So a few weeks ago, my totally normal-seeming best friend revealed to me that in fact she is, and has always been, a mutant. Apparently, one of her legs is longer than the other, to the point where she is having back problems and is now going to have freak-altering, I mean, leg-lengthening surgery. She's started a blog to chronicle her attempts at normalcy. Visit it often to see if it works. Click here to get freaky-deeky with Allison.

Bad job = bad teeth

I forgot to explain the connection between my job and my teeth. According to my dentist, the reason why my tooth is fractured way down in the canal is because I clench my teeth at night. This all makes perfect sense. The worse work was the day before, the worse my tooth and head ache the next morning. In other words, I am losing my teeth because of stress. Yes, I have made an appointment to get a night guard.

Horrible Day

Ooh, yeah, that's the stuff baby. That's what I need. Help me know I made the right choice. :-)

Beautiful Day

I got to do real justice today for very wonderful people, who were actually grateful for my help. It was a welcome change. I really can't be having any more days like this or else I'll be sad that I'm going in a few weeks.

Oh yeah, in case I haven't mentioned it, I put in for a transfer into the civil division at work. They offered me the job, so I get to move once my boss finds my replacement.

It wasn't any one thing that motivated me to go for it; it was more like a little bit of everything. Mostly that I'm at the five-year mark of my career, so I feel like I should be learning more skillz.

I'm sad to retire my prosecutrix title, but I'm happy for the change of pace. I'm actually looking forward to boring paper-pushing for a while. This high-drama criminal stuff can really wear you down.

Another wonderful thing happened today, by the way. Tori Amos' new album American Doll Posse came out today. I got the iTunes version (for the 2 bonus videos & tour pre-sale code) already, and I'm going out for the hard copy tomorrow. Borders has a bonus track exclusive, so I think I'll get it there.

That's all.