(FYI - I wrote a long post yesterday, but couldn't publish it b/c Blogger was being lame and not letting me post pictures. So whatever, It's passed. Stupid Blogger.)
Anyway, onto seedier things. So I'm torn on what to do on something. Yesterday my friend who's in town for a few days made plans with me. Full-on, time-specific dinner plans. Well, 15 minutes before we're supposed to meet for dinner, he tells me he's decided to go and feed homeless people dinner with his other friends instead. While it's fine and dandy that he went and fed homeless people, the fact remains - I was dissed!
We have plans tonight to go to jumpy-land. Now, in reality, I hate jumpy-land b/c it makes my bum knee hurt every time I go. But, as of yesterday, I was willing to forget this minor detail because I wanted to show my friend a good time. Now, all I want to do is tell him I'll be there at 7pm and then not show up. (Take that sucka!!)
I understand, however, that this move could be viewed as vindictive and immature. Still, I can't seem to fight off the desire to do it. Can I get some advice on what the proper response is in this type of situation please? From the cool, collected, objective point of view, I mean.
Thanks.
Refreshed Daphne's Old Bedroom for Alicia
9 years ago
13 comments:
How about just tell him directly that you feel dissed, by pointing out that you and others were looking forward to the dinner and his actions hurt you? That would be the mature way to handle the situation.
Of course, doesn't he read this blog?
Are we talking about greg here? Is he in town already?
-Brad
What if he admitted it was a horrible thing to do as he was doing it and even said he was sorry as he was telling me I was being dissed?
I know that should make me feel better, but it doesn't. It's almost like he was saying: "I know this is rude, but I don't care enough about you for it to matter."
Although he usually reads my blog, I'm assuming he isn't right now since he's on vacation. Even if he is though, he already knows I'm pissed, so this isn't news to him.
Maybe it's just that I'm so used to using punishment in an attempt to curb naughty behavior. What with my job being to assign punishment to deter crime and all. I guess I'm just having trouble figuring out what the appropriate response is here.
Well, Well, Well...I think what he did was down right rude! You don't make NEW plans without checking with the other person first! Was that the only night he could feed the homeless? I'm pretty sure they are hungry EVERY night! I'm all for helping and volunteering....but why the sudden shift in plans? Was he some how all dressed up for your dinner date, when suddenly he got an urgent call to feed the hungry? and couldn't let you know until RIGHT BEFORE you were probably getting ready to step out the door?
Ok. So that would completely piss me off! Unless you were having dinner at Taco Bell or something and it was some sort of casual encounter. But, I also don't think "an eye for an eye" is the best way to handle this situation. YOU need to LEAD by example. Treat HIM as you want to be treated. I think that's the best way. Eventually he'll get the hint. I certainly don't want to flake on friends who have never flaked on me, and vise versa...I'm more tempted to flake on flakey friends....
Eh...long ramble...time to get back to work
No, it's not Greg. Greg gets in Thurs or Fri. It's actually your brother's namesake, Brad.
Greg - Yes, I believe it has. It's classic negative reinforcement. I'll name names to you off the record.
Sugar, you know the best thing about you is that you are straight-up. You've totally called me on shit before. Tell him you were hurt yesterday (um, two yesterdays) when he flaked, and you don't really want to do jumpy-land, and the way to make it up to you is for him to give you some good time and attention. Your friend's time and attention is what you really want out of the situation, right?
(Although it seems like this has come and gone already.)
(Hi everyone!)
maybe it's your jerky attitude?
:)
-Brad
I'm hoping that's a quote, Brad. If it's not, well.. all I can say is that you knew what I was when you picked me up.
er, I mean personality.
There you go!
My suggestion is this:
Pee in a cup and offer it to him as "sun tea".
When he drinks it, you'll laugh on the inside. And if he figures it out, point out that you are not to be fucked with.
- just a freindly idea, don't have to run with it -
Jumpy land sounds lame.
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