Maintaining is the hardest part

My goal is to stay at the weight I'm at. It's proving to be very difficult. I lost another 1.4 pounds today. People do not feel bad for me and don't want to hear me complain, so I won't. I'll just be happy that I'm only one week away from becoming a "lifetime" Weightwatchers member and leave it at that*. Total weight loss so far: 26.8 pounds.




* If you think I'm not eating enough, here's a samplng of this week's menu: A chai tea latte every day; all-you-can-eat Brazilian steak Friday night; brownies and Fritos before dinner Saturday night; steak chili; cheddar chicken with black beans; sushi; steak and potatoes; movie popcorn; sour Skittles; and an avocado and pepperjack chicken sandwich. That's in addition to the yogurt, fruit, Fiber 1 bars, and salad that I eat repeatedly throughout the day. It has to be all the working out (which I refuse to cut back on).

God will punish you

Brian has a strict "no horn" policy in his car. Every time somebody cuts him off or nearly hits him while I'm in the passenger seat, I reach for his horn because I know he will never honk it himself. He's always able to fight me off before I can honk it though.

In my car, it's a different story. It's not that I'm a liberal horn-honker. I'm just not afraid to use it in non-emegency situations to communicate my distaste for what other drivers are doing.

So last night, I'm driving home from seeing Ironman (which freakin' ROCKED, btw), and I'm trying to merge onto the freeway, but this guy won't let me on. Well, my lane is about to let me right back off the freeway, so I slam my brakes and merge behind the guy at the last possible second. In a mini-exercise of wrath (a total sin, mind you), I honked my horn. Unfortunately, it got stuck.

I slowed way down hoping to lose the guy I had just honked at. The last thing I needed was for him to shoot me for laying on my horn. I proceeded to slap and punch my steering wheel in an effort to get it to stop honking. This continued for the next 15 miles. Instead of going home and waking up my neighbors at 10 o'clock at night, I pulled into a parking lot to see if I could fix the problem.

I turned the car on and off, and nothing. I got out and kicked the steering wheel, and nothing. The sound blared on and on. So agitating. So embarassing. Straight out of Little Miss Sunshine. I looked in the owner's manual, and there was nothing about the horn getting stuck. I called Brian to come help, then called Triple A to see if they could help (having to yell over my deafening horn for the lady to hear what I was calling about).

While I sat there waiting, people kept driving by and slowing down to see why I was honking my horn. Was I slumped over the wheel? In need of help? Stealing a car? I just waved them on by. Nothing to see here, keep moving along people.

Forty minutes after it started, Brian managed to get it to stop. (My hero.) Although I was tempted to test the horn to see if it would get stuck again, I resisted. I've learned my lesson. I have now implemented a strict "no horn" policy in my car as well.

Shake that thang, oww

We returned to barn dancing this weekend after about a two year break. It was a good time, and a great cardio workout. Check out Greg's super-masculine do-rag. HOTT!!!

He's got Moxie

At the AIDS Walk on Sunday we saw Penn Gilette with his daughter Moxie Crimefighter. Damn him for stealing my future baby's name!

1-800-4-MY-HO

This van was in front of me the other day while I was driving. It cracked me up! You might have to click on the pic to make it bigger to see why.

Oh, and I just figured out how to blog from my cell phone again. So yeah, expect more cell phone pics like these.

Prego fetish

Jeanny and I went and worked out Saturday morning while I was in Reno this last weekend. (It was a last minute work thing.) Anyway, here's her looking adorable and pregnant in her workout gear. She weighs half as much as me, is 5.5 months pregnant, and she still did heavier weights than I did. She kicks butt!!

AIDS is bad, mm-kay?

Brian and I are doing to AFAN AIDS Walk on Sunday. Brian designed the ad campaign and worked on the commercial with Penn and Teller, so that's how we got involved. I've raised $618.99 so far, which is WAY MORE than I ever thought I would raise. Thanks to everyone who donated. You kick butt. If you want to donate, please visit my personal pledge page. Thanks!!

Pizza Pizza!

Oh, and I forgot the whole point of my last post was to say that I lost 1.4 pounds this week, which puts me back at 174 pounds. That was shocking to me, considering I ate pretty unrestrained while I was in Chicago, including Chicago-style stuffed pizza, Thai food, breakfast sandwiches, and more pizza. Nevermind the fact that I bumped my head on the airport shuttle and needed some comfort food for the pain. Yesterday, I went straight from the doctor's office to the Taco Bell drive-thru for my first Mexican Pizza in 6 months. It was heavenly.

My theory is that this is just the result from two weeks ago when I was actually being good. I have noticed that I have a delay in my weight-loss sometimes. So next week I expect that I'll pay for my Chicago indiscretions. That's cool though. I have a 5-pound cushion before I get too fat to make my "lifetime member" status. Total weight loss so far: 25.4 pounds.

I ate my weight in Chicago-style pizza!

We got back from Chicago Sunday night. Jesse's play was fantastic. He was fantastic. All the other 12 and 13-year-olds were all shy and quiet and scared, but Jesse was all charisma. Nice and loud and funny the whole time. The crowd laughed every time he came out. He was really committed to the role. Playing it up and everything. Great job, honey!

The rest of the trip was cool. I'm super gay for Frank Lloyd Wright, so we went by his original house and studio in Oak Park. He also designed like 10 of the houses in that neighborhood, which were absolutely beautiful. Because it was his very first house that he built when he was young and poor, it was not that impressive. Not nearly as cool as the house he died in 70 years later - Taliesin West in Scottsdale, AZ, which I saw back in December. That house was amazing. But it was still pretty cool. I can happily cross it off my "100 things to do before I die" list.

Sunday we went to the Art Institute and then home. We stayed the weekend with our friends Yasmien and Chris, who were phenomenal hosts. We're planning on going back in the early fall for their wedding. All in all, a very nice weekend.

I thought it was for real

Another hilarious commericial:

Mr. Wind

This commercial is hilarious.  I got it off Megan's blog.

I'm out

We're leaving super early tomorrow morning for Chicago to see Jesse's stage debut. He's got a lead role (Nathan Detroit) in Guys and Dolls. I can't wait to see it. I am such a ridiculous stage auntie already. The weather is supposed to be sh*t, but I'm still excited.

Shaved Pussy

We got our cat Enid shaved last weekend.  Here are a couple BEFORE pictures:

And here are a couple AFTER pictures:

I think it's super cute.  She was just getting too nappy and unkempt. Hopefully she'll appreciate the short do in the upcoming summer months.  

All that ass inside them jeans

I gained a pound this week.  Yeah, that's what happens when you stop keeping track of what you eat and chow down on Chipotle, brownies, cupcakes, and chocolate cake all in the same week.  Oh, and I also boozed it up at David's going away karaoke party last Saturday.  Here's me lap-dancing Brian while singing Tom Jones' Sex Bomb:  

Good times.  Anyway, it's cool cuz I was kinda trying to gain weight this week.  Well, at least stop losing weight.  So yeah, goal accomplished.  Hopefully I'll stay the same next week.  I don't want to gain back too much more. 

Can't turn it off

I lost 1.8 lbs this week. The thing is, I already hit my 22-pound goal 3 pounds ago. I ate way more this week, but I still lost weight. Maybe it's just taking an extra week for the change to kick in. We'll see if I can stop it next week. If not, I'm turning to Ben & Jerry's. Total weight loss so far: 25 pounds.

Hip-Hop Hoor -- oh hell no.

I tried the hip-hop dance class at the gym last night. It was a fu$&ing tragedy. I knew it wasn't going to be pretty when I noticed that the front row was all Asian strippers in midriff hoodies and sports bras.

After five minutes of poppin' and lockin', I was ready to go. My friend Bethany wouldn't let me leave though. Later, the guy in front of her wouldn't stop looking back at her and laughing. She almost cried. I knew we should have left earlier...

I don't think I was the worst in the class. I caught maybe every 4th step or so. But I definitely did not have a good time. And it was not enough movement to be considered a good workout. So I wasted an hour, felt like a gimp, didn't get my cardio done, and hurt my knee.

But for some reason, we're going to try it again next week.

April Fool's Day Jokes Are For Children

That's what my best friend said when I told her I was lying about being knocked up. I got her and a couple of girls from work. I had my pregnant friend Hilary pee on two pregnancy tests and everything. I have to admit, I felt a little bad about it, but it was still really funny. I guess I'm just a child at heart. :-)

Another one bites the dust

Guess who's having a baby? It's Brian and me. We just found out. I'm still in shock, quite honestly. Our plan to wait two years, do genetic testing, and use a surrogate has just gone out the window. I can expect an extremely delicate and stressful pregnancy. Obviously, this wasn't something we planned, but everything happens for a reason, so we're happy about it. Cautiously happy.