The bachelorette party...

I can't tell you how afraid I was about this bachelorette party business. First, the rumor gets out that my best friend and sister are trying to hire a midget stripper clown.. then Allison tells me to wear something I "can get wet and torn." Holy crap.. what have these girls got in store for me??

As it turns out, it wasn't so scary. We started out the evening at our gracious hostess Kat's townhouse. Allison (my best friend), Kelly (her bride-to-be) and Diana (my sister) all did an amazing job decorating.

The night's menu included hot sausage, meatballs, bananas, daquiris and cosmos..

We started the night out by playing games- there was a sexual position word scramble that went by pretty quickly (freaks)...



Then we played pin the macho on the man..








And then pass the pecker, which is like hot potato, only the potato is a neon pink flourescent vibrator that's turned on. Ah ah ah Shawna, no hands, that's cheating!









We also played a game where the girls had to mold the best wee wee shape out of a banana w/ only their mouths. Shannon bit hers in half (ouch!), and Randi's didn't look that happy afterword, which left Vanessa victorious!




The prizes that night were awesome - pregnancy tests, douche, and condoms all around!!







After the games, we opened presents, I got cake smushed in my face (bitchez!!!), then we all went out..







That's when the fun really began. We started at The Beach nightclub. I guess one of the dares was for me to bite off a guy's shirt button w/ my teeth, which I did, even though it hurt!





Only thing is, we sort of lost track of the dares b/t dancing on the stage, running around whipping strangers with the riding crop, getting into catty catfights (not me for once!!) and drunk-dialing ex-boyfriends (not me for once!)..

Still, we pressed on to the titty bar. Thing is, the titty bar was supposed to have boys upstairs and girls downstairs. When we got there though, we found out the boys had the night off. Oh well.. guess we'll have to make do with the girls then...

The girls were very sweet. As soon as I sat down, I was getting a lapdance from two girls at once. I was so shy! I just wanted to get to know them. I remember one girl said she was from Ohio and had 4 kids and only came out once a month to make some extra cash. Between all this talking, they told me to touch them, so I graabbed one booby from each. One girl had real boobs and one girl had fake ones, and it was so obvious in that moment which was which. The fake ones felt cold and hard. The real ones were warm and snuggly. Any desire I had to get a boob-job was gone right at that moment..

Fast forward.. some of the girls started taking off.. more catfights.. some crying.. it all worked out in the end. I think for the most part everyone had a nice time. I know I did. :-) Thanks to all my girly-friends who helped make the night a success.

Here are all the pics I have from that night - page 1 and page 2.