Brace-face

I got my braces last week. I got clear brackets instead of Invisalign because a couple docs told me I wasn't a good candidate for Invisalign. Here are the top brackets. They're putting the wire and bottom brackets in in two weeks.

While I was looking online for the phone number today, I found this raving review about my new orthodontist's office:

"CRACKHEADS - A DENTAL ASSISTANT DROPED A CRACK PIPE ON THE FLOOR DURING MY EXAMINATION... I THINK DRUG TESTING IS IN ORDER."

Awesome.

Can't... move... legs

After my weight-gain this week, I got all motivated to start hitting the gym again. I went this morning for an hour and a half. Not a sissy hour and a half, where I rest for a long time between sets and do a wimpy setting on the elliptical. Oh no, it was hard-core. I felt so good about it afterward, I decided to bike to my eye doctor and to the bike shop later on. Not a good idea, as it turns out!

I left at about 4:30. I just had to pick up my new glasses by 5. The place was only like 2 miles away. I figured 20 minutes was plenty. Not enough time, as it turns out!

Apparently, I don't pay much attention to "topography," so I didn't realize it would be UP HILL THE ENTIRE WAY. I also never really paid much attention to the way gears work, so didn't realize I WAS UNNECESSARILY IN FIRST GEAR THE ENTIRE WAY. It was 5:15 by the time I got to the eye doctor. They hadn't locked the doors yet, so I went in. I think the lady was going to tell me they were closed, but then she saw that I was pouring sweat, heaving and wearing a bike helmet. I think she felt bad that I'd worked so hard to get there just to be turned away, so she took me.

By the time I got done there and at the bike store, it was dark. I had to buy lights for my bike, actually. Which was fine. I probably needed them anyway. But then I had to bike home in the FREEZING COLD, downhill the entire way, so it was EXTRA BREEZY for me. I had snot running down my face the whole way.

By the time I got home, it was 7pm and I looked a mess. Why did I even bother putting on makeup and blow-drying my hair? I had to be at an event at 7pm, so on top of everything, I was late.

So that was my exciting adventure to the bike store. On the bright side, I got to see bunnies along the bike trail and got to eat a big sushi dinner because of the 1000 calories I burned today.

Dental Hell

My last appointment was by far the worst dental experience I've ever had. I cannot put into words how excruciating the pain was. It was worse than getting a dental implant drilled into my jawbone. Worse than getting my wisdom teeth out. Worse than having two root canals done in Mexico. Worse than heart surgery (and they shut my body down and sawed me open to do that sh*t!).

Long story short, a year after my root canal (American this time), my dentist figured out that my endodontist accidentally left a nerve in there, and that's why it never, ever stopped hurting. It started to hurt A LOT more recently because it got infected. The infection caused the novacaine they attempted to inject me with last week to have no effect. Something about the acidity and the pH being off. So, basically, I HAD A ROOT CANAL PERFORMED WITH NO ANASTHESIA!!!

No wonder it hurt so f%@$in' bad! See? I knew I wasn't just a whiny baby! Bastards...

I thought they stopped in the middle of the procedure last week because I was sobbing, shaking, and jerking so violently. I hyperventilated too (for the first time ever).

So today, I thought I was going back for more. You can imagine my joy when they told me they had gotten it all last time and that all I was there for today was an X-ray. Oh thank you Lord Baby Jesus!

They said it looked good for now, but I have to go back in two weeks to see if the pain stays gone. Fingers crossed...